Lies of the Single Christian Male: Part 2

The last “Lies of the Single Christian Male” was written right in the middle of March Madness.  Obviously, why the topic of sports was at the forefront of my mind.

My current lie has been brewing in my mind for years.

Literally years.

I get the following a lot:

“Wow Claire,” (says a gentleman sounding semi-surprised) “you’re pretty funny, I wish I could date someone as funny as you!”

Oh really?

Well, guess what lucky man?! I just so happen to be available!

Oh, you’re not interested?

Okay, that’s cool.

If I had a dollar for every time that happened, I’d have enough money to re-buy myself the science kit my parents bought me for Christmas in 7th grade.  That thing was amazing.  It came with a microscope and slides with an assortment of microorganisms.  Consequently, this also explains why I had a pretty limited friend group growing up …

Anyway, enough about me and onto more about me!


So here is what I think.

I don’t think my Single Christian Guy friends actually want to date a funny lady.  I think they want someone who is going to laugh at their jokes.

And you know what?  I get that.  I totally get that.

I was at the store the other day and to be honest I was a little distracted.  I was with a friend and we were chatting about our days in the middle of the checkout lane.  The guy who was ringing me up asked me to sign my receipt (probably several times at this point) and my response was, “It’s because I’m famous isn’t it?”

He didn’t laugh.

I didn’t even get a smirk.

Not even an acknowledgement that I’d said something.

My ego was crushed.

So I get that.

You just want someone to laugh at your jokes.

Hey, me too.


And this is a big also …

You want a girl with a cute laugh.

A girl with a cute laugh, that thinks all your jokes are funny.

It’s like the American man’s kryptonite.

As my sister told me on Sunday night, my laugh sounds like a witch’s cackle.


I’m off to go boil some frog legs in my cauldron.


5 thoughts on “Lies of the Single Christian Male: Part 2

  1. I don’t know Claire. I mean, I hear you ! I get that. I feel like so many guys praise in me / you/ a lot of girls things that they actually NEVER would like to find in their girlfriends. But humour ? I don’t know. I think those guys, who want a cute little laugh, and girls who think they always are hilarious are just to be avoided in the first place. I’m not sure you’re hanging out with the right crowd. Fortunately, it doesn’t sound like you’re willing to change to fit to their standards, but I just want to make sure you’re not looking down on a clear QUALITY, ASSET you have as a girl and that a lot of us would kill for. I might not be a dude, but Claire, you crack me up. Can’t wait for the next article.

  2. Yeah, I’ve said for awhile I want a single Christian girl who shares my sense of humor who is funny in her own right and finds my jokes funny as well. But this also comes down to the same type of comedy I enjoy, such as Monty Python, shows on Adult Swim, but on the other end of the comedic spectrum, I’m very leery of people who like Big Bang Theory.

  3. Alright Claire, I’ve lurked on a couple of your posts and feel I must finally say something! But mostly just because I have something worth saying.

    I’m here to offer some encouragement. Like Ori said, don’t change anything! Funny girls are awesome. Guys might just be intimidated if you’re funnier than they are. Does that mean you dumb yourself down? Heck no. If you do that, who will you end up with? A dummy. You want someone who has the confidence and humor to match your own. And a guy with that confidence and humor will be attracted to your own humor.

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