Panning For Gold

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone and suddenly they start asking you if you have any “prospects?”

Where are we?

California in 1849 panning for gold?!

No.

Or can we just talk about how a lot of dating metaphors can be linked back to the Wild West? (Another example: “anyone on the horizon?”)

Well, Wyatt Earp, I’m not glad you asked.  But, to be polite, I have to give you an answer.

I usually respond, “no not right now” with the cutest smile I can muster.  However, even my cute smile makes babies cry.

That actually isn’t a joke.  Ask my friends with kids.

Also – most likely, I’m going to lie to you.  I’ll be honest; I usually have a “prospect.” I think every lady does.

This is what happens when your girlfriends know about your "prospect."  - WHY I DON'T TELL PEOPLE!
This is what happens when your girlfriends know about your “prospect.” – WHY I DON’T TELL PEOPLE!

However, I’m already, uncomfortable enough as it is with those things people call “feelings” that telling someone whose not on my “I wouldn’t feel guilty calling you at 2 am” list isn’t going to get the truth out of this girl.

I’m a locked box.

Fort Knox up in here.

Anyway, one of my friends was asked the other day if she had any potential suitors (again, what century is it?).  She said “no not right now,” and the person she was talking with said, “Oh, I’m sorry.”

Long.

Awkward.

Pause.

.

.

.

What …

Really?

You’re sorry?

You must not have heard me.  I said I didn’t have any “prospects” not that I had “terminal cancer.”

The words sound the same.  I know.  I would be confused too.

My friend also noted that she hadn’t felt bad about not having any prospects until this person gave her a sympathetic “I’m sorry.”

Then she suddenly felt really alone.

Very, very, alone.

Awesome.

Despite the fact that I write this blog, I don’t walk around thinking about how much I want to be in a relationship.

I’ve got stuff to do! Blogs to write!  Stocks to trade!

To be fair I did think about being in a relationship a little bit when I was picking up a movie to watch. As soon as I grabbed that cheesy rom-com though I thanked my lucky stars I didn’t have to pass that by a significant other.

PTL – another night with me, my comforter, and a terrible Nicolas Sparks adaptation.

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6 thoughts on “Panning For Gold

  1. This reminds me of the older Christian woman that comes up to you at church as says “I pray for you everyday…….that you will find a godly husband.” Sometimes it just makes me irritated – is my perpetual singleness the only thing about me that deserves prayer? But sometimes I actually do appreciate it. Afterall, it can’t hurt my chances, can it?

  2. http://joycey223.blogspot.com/2013/03/i-am-listening-to-mrs.html We are twins on this. To affirm your “what century” observation, my favorite bad phrasing is “so, are there any gentlemen callers lately?”

    I will definitely look forward to reading more of your blog! Thanks for making me feel better about my life. I only write about singleness once or twice a year, but I did also write one today in my frustration (and then googled single christian girls due to continued jkdsafjkaldsj asdasdfnlsdk). I’m looking forward to reading more about the joys, trials, and tribulations of the wild single christian girl.

  3. You are like the wittier version of me. I only recently discovered your blog, but so far, I can completely identify with all of your posts.

    My similar experience to your post is when one of my friends (who has been in a relationship with her husband since they were in grade school… I’m not even exaggerating) met me for dessert one evening under the guise of catching up and then broke the news to me that everyone in the church feels sorry for me because I’m still single. Long. Awkward. Pause.

    But I’m very grateful that I’ve found your blog as I feel like it gives a voice to our single Christian girl sisterhood. I enjoy your sense of humor and writing style, and I greatly appreciate your perspective. 🙂

    1. NO! Oh sweet baby Moses!!! I cannot believe that happen!!! I mean I can, but that is literally so ridiculous it’s comical. I truly do not get the “I feel so sorry for you stuff” … Ugh. Well hang in there girl. You’re great and your level of amazing-ness is not contingent on your relationship status. Single Christian Girls unite!!!

  4. “The words sound the same. I know. I would be confused too.”
    Spittake.

    I write on similar stuff over at Orthogals. I’m also going to a wedding this weekend. I may write that down on an index card and stuff it in my purse Just In Case.

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