And Then I Decided to Try Online Dating

I am for sure the influence-y in my relationships.

I was texting my friend the other day in the grocery store.  She has several food allergies including being allergic to gluten and dairy.  She also is a ridiculously healthy eater.

We texted the whole way through the store.

When I got home, I realized that literally everything I had purchased was food for rabbits.

No kidding.  I’ve been starving since Monday.

Obviously I am easily influenced.

Therefore, I’m in trouble.

My “friends,” want to join Match.com together.

Real friends don’t make friends join Match.com.

At one point they even suggested having one of our talented videographer friends film the experience and pitch it as a new reality TV show.

Dating Christian Girls.

Not much more entertaining than watching paint dry.

But anyway, after a few glasses of the blood of the covenant, I turned from, “there is no way you would ever get me to do that,” into throwing one of my girlfriends my phone and saying, “make sure to make me sound good!  And mention that I’m tall and blonde!”

Oh how the mighty have fallen.

So I currently have a profile on Match.com.

I am so sorry.

I feel like I’ve failed you!

I feel like I’ve failed myself!

You know what, at least it’s not Christian Mingle.

For sure I’m about to bash Christian Mingle, how can you not?  They’ve totally set themselves up for it.  That website is honestly like a cute girl standing by the edge of the pool.  She’s going to get thrown in.  It’s inevitable.  I’ve seen it happen.

The few problems that I have with Christian Mingle are (I also should note I owe a lot of these observations to Matt Moberg):

  1. “Find God’s Match for You” – the tagline of Christian Mingle.  What?  Really?  God’s match for me is only going to be on that site?  I’m not sure.  And by not sure, I think you sit on a throne of lies.
  2. “Delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” – Christian Mingle’s verse.  Nope.  You keep using that verse.  I do not think it means what you think it means.  I feel like I’m Inigo Montoya and you killed my father. Image
  3. Also – “Christian Dating for Christian Singles.” – um … yeah … I just … hum.  How do I put this delicately?  I don’t think Christians know how to date.  Yup.  I said it.  We sure don’t.  Also, just a note, I’m putting myself in that category.  The move from, “oh we’re hanging out” to “we’re getting married” is faster then you can say “C.S. Lewis,” so watch yourself friends.  One minute you’re on a date, the next minute you’re engaged.

Yes.  That is terrifying.

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2 thoughts on “And Then I Decided to Try Online Dating

  1. CC, I met my BFF 2 1/2 years ago on Match.com You have to sift through a few oysters before you find the pearl but, in the long run, it is worth it. I found a real gem and an intelligent, funny, faithful partner.
    Give it a try. What do you have to loose?

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