Ice Cream and The Notebook.

I was on the “intranets” using the old google machine when I stumbled across this blog post on another site about putting God first and the right guy will just show up.  The writer said:

So whether you are reading this and you are the 16 year old who has a Pinterest board full of wedding dresses and engagement rings, the 26 year old woman that is wondering when it will be her turn or the girl who has no idea what her wedding will look like. Be present and thankful of where you are now.

My initial reaction was, “those are some pretty good thoughts, I’m going to ignore the Pinterest dig, but in general … good thoughts.”  Then, at the bottom of the page, next to her bio, it said this:

Sarah grew up in a Pastor’s home and now finds herself married to one.

I mean.

Are.

You.

KIDDING

ME?!?!?!

So much anger.

It’s honestly a little hard to quantify exactly how angry I am.

Why?

YOU DON’T GET TO WRITE A SINGLES BLOG, OR A BOOK FOR SINGLES WHEN YOU’RE ALREADY MARRIED.

Can I please get an amen?!

Especially since the author of that blog was like 16 when she got married.

No, she’s not from Kentucky.

Good question though.

Seriously.

I hate that.

Of course it’s easy for you to be positive about it.  You’re already married.  But guess what 36 year old woman that wrote a great blog post about waiting for the right guy, even though she’s married with two kids: you forgot that low point when you were bawling your eyes out, stuffing your face with ice cream, all alone in your parents house at 32, watching the notebook for the 5th time in one day after being dumped by your long term boyfriend.

Yeah.

I want that ladies opinion.

Not yours.

I want to stop eating ice cream, or in my case going shopping, without having to get married first.

Can a single lady please tell me how to do that?

Thanks.

Image
Just because it’s funny.
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8 thoughts on “Ice Cream and The Notebook.

  1. CC, you will still have days when eating ice cream is better then marriage. Spoken by a true believer in waiting for the right guy.
    Signed, single at 64 1/2 and enjoying ice cream . . . after eating two lactaid tablets!

  2. DUDE. You are SO right I could scream. I actually read her blog before yours and thought the same thing. I actually think the same thing WHENEVER I see someone that is young and married and writes a blog about singleness. It KILLS me. Like UHM….what about those of us that didn’t get married at 18? Gosh. I’ve read one post and I already love you. I’m writing a blog of my own about singleness (just one post) and I’d love to get your answer/opinion on a couple things. You rock, sister.

  3. Hi there… I was searching for single womens blogs and happened upon this one. This is so funny… some things that I have thought when women tell me these things about singleness… But I must say we should welcome the teachings of these married women. Because they don’t know how we feel, they are less inclined to depend on their own experiences and emotions and stand more on the word of God. The same would go if I gave advice to a married woman on how to deal with her husband.

  4. I also found your blog after searching for blogs for single Christian women and I am already in love with your style and perspective. Thank you for being authentic and funny. 🙂

  5. You obviously have the gift of comedic hilarity pouring from the tip of your inkwell (or I guess Macbook?). Yes. That is the best.

    I, on the other hand, find the comedy pouring from my mouth to be of the quality of burnt toast. So I’ll just stick to what I do best and give a thought-nugget that came to mind with your last question.

    **BRACE YOURSELF….I didn’t think this would be that long of a comment. Forgive me.**

    My “eating ice cream and shopping” in response to the horrifying reality that is dating is the ever-dreaded but culturally coveted binge-watching of television shows. Once Upon A Time may or may not have been the most recent culprit. #savehenry. Anyway, I recently decided to pick apart my spiritual innards and figure out the real reason I was pouring myself into this show like an addict, and though I’m still sorting I’ve come away with a couple things:

    One: finding ourselves in anything outside of God (whether a show, ice cream, shopping, or even a marriage/relationship) is idolatry. Two: the aforementioned idols, among the maaaany possible, are all forms of escapism. I mean, all idols are. Attempts to escape “reality.” I guess we just get stuck with our definition of what our present reality is, and try to escape it; forget it, instead of focusing on Jesus Christ’s majesty like Stephen in Acts 7 [as he is getting stoned, mind you – and I mean the Biblical kind of stoned]. *Note: I feel like a hypocrite saying this, but* is Christ coming for a stubborn bride that’s full of impurities and specks because she refuses to go through the purification and refining process? [Audience: Noooo.] No. Distracting ourselves from our woes is escapism…defined ever so poignantly by Urban Dictionary as “the best way to leave your own life behind, and become king of your own little world.” *Note 2: Alert the hypocrite police because I do this aaaaaall the freaking tiiiiime.*

    He is, though, coming for a bride (a Church) who, no matter how many times she takes her eyes off the road, He can call back and receives the generous love He wants to give so freely, without condition (I’d like to think that since God made our gastrointestinal systems, He is comfortable with you tooting and would accept you regardless, unlike that unfortunate date where you had to hold it in). But really, a safe driver wouldn’t text and drive while going 70 mph; she’d keep her eyes on the stinkin road and avoid accidents. You know, she watches [maximum] 15 seconds ahead and prepares for it, but keeps her eyes on the road. You don’t multitask, and you don’t try to see the destination before you’ve made the drive. Just like that, a faithful bride enjoys her time with Christ for what it is now. No texting while driving/ignoring the journey she’s on. But also no neuroticism about the future and “when will it come already?” He wants us to enjoy His presence right now (to be present).

    As a single twenty-something whose friends are also dropping like flies (like, how am I supposed to fly back to the United States for all of your weddings when I am livin it up doing important single lady Jesus things in Central America??), I totally get it. This is just an uber roundabout way of processing the concept that maybe that married lady (as irrelevant her experiences may be to our single lives) was right in saying we should – and more than should, CAN (and that is the most important thing, that it’s possible) – be satisfied, happy, joy-filled with where we are.

    My pragmatic advice on how to stop with the idol thing…….I don’t know, yo. But I do know that Jesus redeems everything. Eeeeverything. So practical ideas that maybe I will also implement…?

    -Go make more platonic friends to go do platonic Jesus things with. Yay!
    -Lots of team rec sports (exercise&interaction&notspendingmoney=good).
    -Crafts. Crafts. Crafts. Although you may not be the Pinterest-y type. It’s chill.
    -Pray with older single women, if you know any. They might need encouragement more than us in our 20s/30s, and it’s happy-making to give encouragement!
    -Put yourself in a different cultural context (I mean subcultures here). Like become real friends with someone who lives life differently than you. Maybe somebody likes screamo, has never been told they look good in pink and just needs a reliable friend. Maybe they’re of a different socioeconomic class and need a listening ear. Maybe you will be a light to them. And then all that frustration of singleness will *poof*! Vanish. HA just kidding but it will make it a lot more enjoyable!
    -Invest in a puppy. If you can’t handle, try a fish. If you somehow manage to kill any small animal that moves, get a plant.
    -Lastly, just get off the Hey Christian Girl tumblr. Ryan Gosling’s never going to jump out of the computer screen and invade your life like Somarra in The Ring.

    I sincerely apologize for smacking a full-on blog-size comment on your blog. Please accept my humble pie that I’m about to stuff my face with.

    *Note…it’s actually pumpkin [pie].*

  6. Hi! Sorry I’m so late to the discussion – I only recently discovered your blog so I’ve been clicking through the back catalogue. I really enjoy your wit and humour.

    I get what you mean about married bloggers issuing advice to singles, but sometimes it does work – really! My favourite single women’s blog is called Seraphic Singles. It’s written by a devout Catholic woman who is a very funny writer. She started writing it in 2006 when she was single, but she’s got married since then (at the age of 38). Although she’s married, for a long time she wasn’t, and she hasn’t forgotten what it’s like to be single and surrounded by couples. If you are interested in checking out her blog, here is the link: http://seraphicsinglescummings.blogspot.com.au/

    Anyway, thank you for your blog! It makes me laugh all the way over here in Australia!

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